One simple thing you can do to increase the sense of connection and belonging around you: ask people what’s their name – and remember it.
(That’s it. That’s the tip.)
Maybe you dream of going to places “where everybody knows your name”, but are you taking the time to learn theirs?
Specially in places you visit often and can be very transactional (retail, hospitality, transport, office…) where people can feel unseen and replaceable. Kindly ask cleaners and shop assistants how they’re called, and observe the surprise and confusion at being seen as humans at all.
3 ideas to help you remember:
- Ask how they spell it or what’s the story behind it. Listen intentionally as this will support memory creation.
- Use your phone. Write down the names and little details that will help you connect with them at a human level next time you visit.
- Be honest about your difficulty remembering names, state that it’s important to you to make the effort and that you’ll ask on various occasions until it sticks.
If you practice this consistently, you will notice a shift in some people – they will seem lighter, warmer, and they will welcome you with that energy.
Human connection can be very complex, but it can also be very simple sometimes.
Photo by cottonbro studio
